I want to be...

I want to be... A more beautiful person.

I am not talking about exterior beauty and all of the complications that come with physical "perfection". But rather the simplicity of a beautiful spirit. 

I want to exude a beauty that is birthed out of love, kindness, grace, mercy, generosity, compassion, and joy.

Most importantly, I want my God in heaven to look down at me and be pleased with how I am living this precious life He has given me. I want more than anything for HIM to see me as beautiful.

Snap back to reality

Over the past 2 weeks, 3 things in my life have completely been put on pause. They are:

My healthy eating habits. They have been replaced with things like pecan pie, sugar cookies, egg nog, and mashed potatoes that I'm pretty sure were made with about 9 sticks of butter.

My workout routine. Haven't laced up the Nike Shox since last Tuesday.

My book. I was flying through the book I started 3 weeks ago, and now I haven't read a page in about 10 days.

I will blame this situation on...the holidays and the weather.

Needless to say, I feel like a lazy heffer. My body is not responding well either, my tummy hurts and I am sluggish to say the least.

Come Monday, it's back to reality. Back to the gym, back on track.

The time has come

Countless hours of shopping, and hundreds of dollars spent are represented with the gifts beneath our tree.

Over the course of the next 48 hours, these gifts will be given out, and opened. Then they will be hung in a closet or thrown in a toy box. The gift cards and cash will be spent on more stuff that we really don't need.  

The other day on our local news, they were interviewing a 9 year old girl who I was amazed by. This little girl had decided to give away her entire Christmas to kids who had been abused.

Not just the gifts from her parents, but her ENTIRE Christmas. Every single gift she got from Grandma and Grandpa, aunts, uncles, friends...she gave it all away to those less fortunate than herself.

For a little girl who probably had a list for Santa that was a mile long, to be so selfless was so awesome to me.

 For Justin and I, it was even difficult to think of anything we wanted for Christmas this year, because we already have so much.

So tomorrow and Thursday as the people who love you shower you with gifts, give them a little extra thanks, and remember that you are blessed!  

Understanding the "Terrible 2's"

I put Javen down for a nap this afternoon.

2 hours later, this is what I found.

I guess he decided to do something more fun with those 2 hours.

A Juicy Question

 Two years ago, Justin bought me a giant bottle of Juicy Couture perfume for Christmas. I have worn it faithfully almost every day. It has become sort of my "signature scent". But now I am tipping the bottle to get the last few drops out. So, with Christmas fast approaching, the question is this; do I ask for another bottle of Juicy? Or do I make the switch to something new?

Hmmmm...that is the question.

Get me out of here!

This is what I am craving.

I can see myself sitting in one of these chairs.

I can almost feel the hot sun on my skin.

What's that you said Mexico?.... You want me to come back and visit you?

Hopefully a tropical vacation isn't too far away, 5 year anniversary perhaps?

I need the beach. That's right, need.

Things that make me say "Grrrr..."

Most people think that I am just so laid back and easy going, that nothing really bothers me. Most people probably assume that I just coast along, letting any issues go in one ear and out the other.  Well, I was thinking today...there are some things that really bother me, I just choose to keep my mouth shut about them.  Here are a few personality traits, or rather..."character flaws" that really bother me:

-Gossips... I can not stand it when people gossip. I realize that most of them do it out of jealousy, insecurity, or just in an attempt to make themselves look better while making someone else look bad. This is the same category in which I would place "tattle-tales". People, even grown adults who are just waiting for someone to fail so that they can go "tattle" on them. To me, that's not walking in love. We all make mistakes.

-Liars... Straight up lying is just wrong. But it also bothers me when people exaggerate the truth, to make a story seem much better or much worse than it actually is. I suppose this is in an attempt to either gain more sympathy than what is actually needed, or to make themselves sound better than they actually are. I don't understand how people can lie to others, and be ok with it. Doesn't your conscience just beat you up afterwards? I can remember every time I've told a big lie, and how miserable I've felt afterwards. Maybe some people just become so accustomed to lying, that it doesn't phase them anymore.

-DRAMA!...I am not into drama...at all! Most of it is pointless, a waste of energy. I don't understand the point in getting everybody stirred up over an issue that is usually, as King Solomon said, meaningless.

I really try hard to not be any of these things, but like everyone I sometimes stumble into one of these categories.  So, what bothers you? What personality traits, or character flaws make you say "Grrrrr..."?

My Sister

This is my sister Karlee. She is 3 years younger than me.

When we were kids, and even through junior high, we hated each other.

I don't know if it was a jealousy thing or what. But I remember times when we would literally be on the ground fighting. You know, the girl way of fighting...scratching each other, pulling hair...the hard-core stuff.

Now that my sister and I are both adults, we have become pretty close. We are good friends.

So today, I am very sad.

Today Karlee left for Arizona. She made the decision to move there...for reasons outside of any one else's opinions or influence.

My sister is a beautiful girl, with huge potential. So many people can see that inside of her. Now I'm just praying that she will see it herself.

For those of you who know her, keep her in your prayers! 

So many options...

Last night at Financial Peace University we were asked the question "If money was not a setback, what would you choose to do with your life?"

Now, this might sound a little conceited, please don't take it that way though...

I have been blessed in so many ways. I have often thought, "I wish I could give something inside of me to someone else. That way I would not have to feel guilty about not using some of my talents."

I have musical talent.- I wish I could gig every weekend, make a record, and be more involved in the praise and worship ministry.

I have artistic talent- I wish I could open a gallery, teach workshops, do custom paintings.

I have a heart for teenage girls- I wish I could spend quality time with every girl in my small group, take them on trips, learn who they are.

I have an eye for design and architecture.- I wish I could custom-design homes for people.

I am athletic and in good shape.- I would love to get into personal training, I would love to play in a court volleyball league.

Every time I think about these things, I get overwhelmed. I look at all of the things I am capable of doing. And they are all good things! All things that would fulfill a passion and desire inside of me.

But, I have to constantly remind myself that there is a season for everything.

Right now primarily, it is my season to be a mother. And I really do love my job! I am learning how to take the talents God has given to me, and apply them to being a mommy. Things like, doing art projects with Javen... even if it is just scribbling with crayons. 

When you are in the position I am in, with so many options, so much you could be doing... you have to cheat something. I don't want to cheat my family. I trust that the opportunity for me to experience more is on it's way...in God's timing.

What about you? What would you do? Or are you doing it???

Modern Obsession

For those of you who don't know it, I have a bit of a fetish with modern design and architecture.

Since I was in 7th grade, I have always loved designing floor plans for homes. I guess this tendency came from my dad being a custom-builder. He was constantly scribbling out ideas and sketches for the next home to build.

The crazy thing is that if you were to come to our house right now and go through a few drawers, you would find several pads of graph paper filled with floor plans and design ideas. For the past 10 years, the passion I have for modern designing and architecture hasn't withered at all.

Just so happens I married a guy who is capable of building a home with his own two hands.

I know that someday we are going to buy a piece of land and build a sick, custom designed (by me) modern home. Maybe something similar to the home in the photo above.